Goodbye to all my friends here, and we go back a long time

09/07/2012 - 20:59

I am terminally pissed off with this forum, but it would be polite for me to say goodbye to some virtual friends - so, goodnight Gala, Sagraisolar, Badger, Angie, and apologies to those who I have forgotten to mention. But when I have followed, and (even) contributed to a thread, and then find it has been blocked to me, then I really do not feel welcomeSo - goodbye friends - I'm not going to be here anymore. As you'll realise, it is nothing remotely personal.


That is a shame. I shall be sad to see you go. You do provide rather good advice and encouragment. You have obviously lived in Italy for a long time and have great understanding of the people and the country.  

Hi Filide, I don't know you but I always think your posts are fantastic! I think it would be a terrible shame if you left the forum and I personally hope you like the "holiday" idea that Angie and Robert have put forward... Whatever you decide, best wishes to you and thanks for all the help you have offered on this forum over the time you have been involved. As an old song had it "may the long time sun shine upon you..." Pamela 

Fillide, please don't go away. As Angie says, take a break and when you feel like it, come back. Your contribution is too valuable. I must admit that I am also getting a bit disappointed with the forum. And I have also experienced quite a few "technical" problems, difficult to explain. As far as I know, there are no moderators around. I guess that Admin has decided not to intervene and there has been occasions when a more active attitude would have been welcome. In my case, I have decided to relax, read whatever I want to read and ignore the rest. If I feel that I can make some contribution or encourage someone,  I write. I don't argue, I don't worry anymore. It must be old age and its wisdom creeping. As I said before, please stay, Fillide.

Your contributions are too important, though i can understand why the prats make you want to chuckit all in.  Take a break and hopefully tose who really p€&s you off will get bored and disappear.  

"Your contributions are too important, though i can understand why the prats make you want to chuckit all in. Take a break and hopefully tose who really p€&s you off will get bored and disappear." Ram, where does Fillide say she is leaving because the prats make her want to chuck it all in? Fillide says she is terminally pissed off with this forum because she finds herself "blocked" from threads she is contributing to or following.  If it was because she was terminally pissed off by the prats here - she would have surely chucked it all in years ago...

I would imagine that if it were purely because of the odd technical reason, then Fillide wouldn't be leaving.  It's most-likely the 'straw that broke the camel's back' me thinks.  Real pity though.  Although I don't contribute a lot here - mostly since it switched to its current format,  I check in and follow what's going on regularly.  Fillide is one of the most valuable members & it's a real shame to see her go.

Sorry to hear that it has come to this for you, and as one of the more 'sensible' Posters here, it must be bad to make you pack it all in. Though I can understand as this site has no input from Admin/Moderators so it looks like they've jumped ship before you, so God knows who is blocking content to you. Glad it's not the inane ramblings of a few of us that has driven you to it, still plenty of other Expat Forums you can help out.

In reply to by Flip

it must be my fault, I suggested she post in the succession group, but did not think this would be hidden from the public page which everybody had already commented on. Hope Filide will change her mind....

I have to say Fillide (if you still have a peak !)...........your posts have been invaluable to me and no doubt many others over the years, I have taken the odd bit of criticism (undeserved in my view !) from other long standing members when raising the suggestion of any problems on this site.........BUT.... There are occasions when I think the site has gone to sleep, but always it bounces back and acts as normal. I agree that it would be good to be able to have some interaction with the moderators or whoever 'they' are, but 'they' seem reluctant to come on board. Regarding technical issues...............I have to say that I do not see or experience (pretty much) any at all? Could you maybe make us aware of what specific issues you have (maybe pm me or others?), we may be able to help ? Good luck whichever way you decide to go and thanks again for your input, S

Because there has been a lot of dicussion on another thread (Where have all the posts gone) I think I'd better explain why I hate this forum format so much that I have decided to leave it. Gala, and Charlotte, have explained the mechanics of what happened to the Inheritance post. I accept that if I asked Charlotte for membership of the relevant group I would be acceped. However, Flip has nailed the 'censorship' issue which is at the root of my concern. My uderstanding of an Internet Forum is that it is principally a public place, where people post questions and get answers. For it to be useful, this must all be searchable on google. (I insist on Google because it is far and away the best search facility on the Web, massively outperforming any local site search option.)  Now, as I undestand it, nothing in the inheritance 'group' will be searchable on Google - thus it does not interest me in the least to join it. It won't be findable even on this site's search facility. I am apalled by the situation on this forum where an existing publicly posted query can be squirelled away by just anyone.  I'd accept deletion of something considered completely offensive by the admin, but that's it, (and as an aside, the comments in the state of Italy thread were not in any way offensive, in my opinion). If I want to make available aything which is only viewable by a limited audience I can use e-mail, or indeed, Facebook. I wouldn't use an internet forum. So, just so that everybody knows, I didn't take against any personalities, or any comments, only this place.

Fillide, I am glad that you are still "keeping an eye" on us and I still trust that you will rejoin us. I think that, as I have said before it is all a misunderstanding.  I cannot speak on behalf of the member who started and manages the "Italian inheritance group", Charlotte Oliver, but I am certain that she will confirm my words. When you start a group, you have the privilege of opening membership to anyone who applies for it or you have the power to accept or refuse membership. In other words, you can make it an open or a closed group. It is obviously the decision of the "manager" of the group. It can also happen that the person has not realised this characteristic of the groupsband has made it a closed one without realising it. Over the years, I have started several groups, but I have always been careful about leaving them open. Furthermore, whenever I start a thread in those groups, I always make them "public" and not restricted to the group. The Administration, as far as I know, has never interfered in the group formation or contents. Ther has been, from time to time, some technical problems, which i could not qualify as "intervention" or "censorship". Recently, there has been a banning of a member and this obviously has been done by Admin and, having participated in discussions with that particular person, I do understand the reasons behind the banning as they were direct attacks against Italy that cannot be tolerated in a Community "for people who love all things Italian". FIllide, I would really like to see you back. Although we may not always agree on everything, I value your input and it is good to have a variety of opinions. Otherwise, this site would be very boring... 

Hi Gala, I do agree with your views (in the main), you say 'Recently, there has been a banning of a member and this obviously has been done by Admin' ............I recently made the assumption that the said member had been 'removed' and I also commented recently that he/she was going on and on about doom and gloom and it was depressing ( and by the way got admonished by another member for 'burying my head in the sand' !). Do you actually KNOW the the said member has been 'banned' ? If so how do you know, is there somewhere on the site that tells us this ? Just interested........ S

'I do understand the reasons behind the banning as they were direct attacks against Italy that cannot be tolerated in a Community "for people who love all things Italian". Gala do you actually read what you put, how absurd 'direct attacks against Italy' are you insinuating that the person was a member of a Terrorist cell or something? They were merely reiterating information that was freely available in the media, and expressing an opinion on that, which may or may not be contentious depending on your point of view; now if you get banned for that then that is Censorship pure and simple. Likewise if everybody who expresses an opinion or negative comment about Italy should be tarred with the same brush and banned then what state has this Forum/Community got to?? Fascist ?

It was not a balanced opinion, based on half truths and totally derogatory. And it was not a single post. It was a monologue of doom and gloom. This is a commercial site promoting Italy. And do not twist my words to try to suit you. This same person has already caused harm to other forums. This has already been expressed by another member.

No, Sprostoni. I do not know anything more than you do and, as far as I know, there is no way to know about this; however, after so many years in both the old forum and this Community, you do "know" when someone has been banned. The name and his/her posts simply "disappear" and you cannot access them.  Against what has been said and what I even thought at times, Admin watches what is said. I have not seen "censorship " as such and sometimes I would have thought that some reaction would have been warranted. As I always say, we can discuss anything and what is needed is self-moderation. Sometimes, those of us who have been here for a long time and have seen many things that have happened become a bit "edgy" when we have doubts about certain identities. You have been once at the "receiving" end. We do not mean any harm; however, we do try to defend all what has been achieved and to protect a site that is dear to our hearts. I do not think that we can be blamed for that. 

Based on her most recent post it appears that Fillide doesn't want to continue posting here. If you scroll up you can see that for yourself by her own recent message, in case you have not read it. I think it also important to emphasize that a person be aware that unless clearly controlled by the poster, what is messaged in a Public area, on-line, could show up in a google search.

Apologies - I have come a bit late to this thread as I have not accessed the site for a while but I just wanted to say, whatever happens, how much I appreciate the advice Fillide has given in the past ... and I hope that she will do so again in the future.